The Ugly Side of My Life.

If you thought I had it all together, you’re sooo wrong. My day so far has gone something like this:

Sadie woke up at 6:30. I fed her, cuddled some in bed, set her down and the screaming began. I tried distracting her with toys. She bit me. She’s drooling. I guess it’s teething again.

I put her in the high chair for breakfast. She throws her food at me. I tell her no. I wait a couple minutes a try again. She throws food at me. I say no. She screams and cries. I take her out of the high chair to send the message that we don’t throw food. If we do, that tells Mommy we’re not hungry.

She’s on the floor flailing in a temper tantrum. I give her a mesh feeder figuring her teeth are just hurting too badly. She plays and cries, then plays and cries some more.

Nap time. Fail. Diaper change. Fail.

Go to the park (screaming all the way there). We play with some whining. We try eating a snack since breakfast didn’t go well. We throw a tantrum again. People stare in disgust like I have no clue how to mother my own child. I do. She’s teething.

She passes out in the car on the way home. She finally eats some lunch.

Diaper change. Poopy. Doesn’t want to lay down. Poop gets everywhere. Screaming child and poop. Lovely.

She’s exhausted as I nurse her before her nap. Ready to pass out by the time she’s done. She should be.

Put her in the crib and walk out. Screaming for 45 minutes and counting. No sign of a nap. Again.

I’m ready to cry.

It’s these days that I am totally overwhelmed and feel like I’m majorly failing as a Mom. But it’s not the failing in making Sadie feel any better until those teeth come through that I’m talking about.

It’s failing because on the days where it’s simply exhausting to be Mommy, I realize I’m probably so exhausted because I haven’t taken ample time for myself to recharge so when these times come, I am not already at point of an emotional breakdown myself.

  • I’m not good at asking for help.
  • Sometimes I feel like I don’t have anyone to ask for help from.
  • I don’t go anywhere by myself to recharge on a regular basis.
  • I let myself slip into last place on the totem pole because there are always other responsibilities pressing for my time.
  • I just don’t do anything because we don’t have extra money for me to go spoil myself with something, so I don’t bother with anything.

Basically, there are some things to change and that need re-prioritizing in my life to make days like this not so dismal.

I know there are always good days and bad days as a Mom, but I don’t want to be at the end of my rope the next time a bad one comes along.

What do you Mom’s out there do to make sure you’re functioning at 100% for yourself?

 

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3 thoughts on “The Ugly Side of My Life.

  1. that sucks friend. i’m really sorry. i don’t have the tantrums yet, but i can relate on the no naps today! my mom to comes over and plays with silas at least once a week so i can get things done around the house without thinking about what to do with silas. even an hour of doing house work alone is awesome! or just leaving silas to play with sam while i cook dinner is super helpful! utalize friends {hint hint}… silas loves playing with friends for an hour here and there! lets plan girls night at my place at least every other week one night to chat! your a great mama! and sadie is blessed to have such amazing parents!

  2. I’m pretty sure I could have written that list. It’s not fun when even a haircut is a luxury! And it’s hard to keep moving forward when you are emotionally spent. Think going for a walk in the morning before everyone is up or at least getting up a little earlier for that quiet cup of coffee might help? Ilan is a super light sleeper in the morning so if I am up he is, but if it worked for me I would totally do it. That silence is golden.

  3. Don’t know if this helps at all but something I’ve done is put Gabe to bed super early (by 6pm). Other people think we’re nuts but he sleeps till 7am, & when Lucas is home we have an evening together alone, & on the nights he works, I have the evening all to myself. I can’t leave of course but I have peace & quiet & can get stuff done or sometimes just take a nice quiet bath, read, watch a hulu show, FB, etc. I just keep my baby monitor nearby so I always know he’s okay & I can relax or be productive, but either way, I’m more rejuvenated throughout the day than when he stayed up later… He’s rested and I’m happy. 🙂 I’m still looking for ways to keep me loving life but this has really helped us a lot so far!

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